Decisions, decisions

I got myself out of bed today, like all other days... I showered, put my makeup on, tried a new hairstyle etc. Casey wanted to snuggle and he was on my bed, waiting for me. His little paws, big eyes, and wet nosey... The perfect combination of cuteness, and the fact that this was a very rainy day made this morning a fight to get out of bed. Each day I make a considered decision: to get out of bed or to snuggle till noon and miss class. I have not missed class yet. I left the house, a tearful, passionate goodbye of "I love you, boombop!!!" and "I'll miss you caser lil man," and "I'll be home soon, cookie-mooka!"  I got a bigass cup of coffee and a bigass cup of ice water from Dunkin. Ate my breakfast while driving (chicken burger bites with egg, broccoli, spinach) and did so very carefully. I received an e-mail from my English professor canceling class. I thought to myself, "Hannah you're going to be late for public speaking, and English is cancelled. Fuck it. Turn back."   I watched the traffic move as i held my little Tupperware between my legs and took another bite. If you're wondering if I turned back, I'm telling you now that I denied myself a free day off. I know that my education is a privilege that so many would take advantage of if they had the opportunity. Since I'm self-aware and great in a thousand ways, I went to school. I got to Nassau and there were no open parking spots. I had to park off-campus in the dirt lot- oh, sorry, the mud lot... And trek in the pouring rain to public speaking. All the way there I said to myself, "turn back! Don't you dare turn back! Go, fuck it just go home! No..." and so on. Finally I walked in, shoes squeaking, 13 minutes late. I was greeted with timid, kind smiles. Professor Zigottis was telling a riveting story, and I had interrupted. I could not turn back. I think the only thing I really missed was his riveting story because for the rest of the class we went over what I had read in the textbook... At the end of class I remembered to ask him if I could sign the attendance sheet. He said "oh I didn't feel like sending a sheet out, so...everybody's here today!" And I said to myself... "I SHOULD HAVE TURNED BACK YOU CRAZY PROFESSOR WHY DID YOU WHY WHY WHY" So I said to him, "I'm sorry I was late. Have a great day!"  I made my way back to the slippery lot of doom and into my mini-van. Currently, I'm sitting in my car outside the Levittown library, dreading the rain again... Thinking to myself, "why not just turn back? Spend some time with the puppies... Maybe stop and get some ice cream... Relax until work..." Of course not. I'm going to go to the library, pour my heart and soul into this paper, organize my notes, and make this day worthwhile. Then if there's time, I will snuggle with cookiedog. This is the plight of a white middle-working class female NCC student named Hannah Duffin.